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By MyselfI feel it, clawing at me.
My heart shredded, destroyed by them.
In tattered bits it hangs from me, bleak and dismal in appearance .
The pain it brings me is unbearable, it never leaves me.
I try to find relief in friends, family, anything.
But nothing takes the pain away.
The memories of those days bring a slight amount of relief.
The days of oblivious happiness, where nothing mattered except your friends.
But they are gone, everyone is gone and I am left all alone.
Alone with this destroyed, useless, beaten heart.
It burdens me with thoughts of the past, I beg it to leave, but I am stuck with.
Stuck with the pain it brings, the memories it forces into my head, the constant grief it gives me.
I walk around a shell of who I used to be.
Nothing can remove what I feel, I am stuck with these feelings.
Feelings of remorse, of pain, of a dead love.
They will always haunt me.
I fall to the ground, the pain overwhelms me.
I can feel the thoughts tear at my heart.
They injure me more, the pain
These MemoriesI'm being torn apart from the inside.
My head is being split in two by a force unknown.
I cannot sleep, eat, and hardly breathe.
The only thing I know are the thoughts that run through my mind.
Thoughts of people, places, times.
They are all I have, all I need.
I wander my mind aimlessly, searching for thoughts lost long ago.
As soon as I find one, another escapes my grasp.
I am trapped in a never ending circle of finding and losing my memories.
Memories of friends disappear, only to be replaced by thoughts of times and dates.
No longer can I remember their faces, their voices.
They are gone until I reclaim them again.
Several memories combine together, utterly confusing me.
"Will this cycle of lose and gain never cease." I ask myself.
The memories continue, they overwhelm me, they confuse me, they torment me.
I want it to end, I need it to end.
But they never will.
I am forced to live my life with these thoughts, real and imaginary.
Patrick M. Finney
Fear and HopeTrapped in a maze of despair.
Walking in circles, unable to find my way out.
I am forced to travel these passages for as long as I live.
Fear, a creature of the night, a beast of anguish, despair, and anger.
He creeps into my mind and takes control.
Hope, a spirit of light and day, a being of comfort, peace, and love.
He fight's to help me, he fights for me, but cannot win.
He is being slammed to the ground by Fear.
And yet, Hope never gives in, he always gets back up.
I admire Hope's courage, I wish that it was mine, but it is not.
Fear has taken me over, along with many others.
We tremble at the sight of him, he has us under his power.
Hope grows weaker, he is failing under the might of his brother.
Fear though, is growing stronger, there seems to be no stopping him.
I call out to Hope, I want him to win, I need him to.
He just lies on the ground, as if dead.
I look away and cower as Fear comes near me.
His voices shakes the cavern we are in, he says, "Why do you call on Hope? He is
Alone But Not HelplessI can hear them, hundreds of them, all coming for me.
I readjust the grip on my shotgun and walk into a pitch black room.
As I turn a flashlight on I can hear something shuffling from behind me.
Spinning around I see one, it dashes towards me.
Raising my gun I wait for it to come closer.
I see out of the corner of my eye another one coming too.
As I shoot the first one, nearly missing it's head, the second lunges at me.
I dive to the left, hardly missing it's razor sharp claws.
I take several shots but none of them manage to hit it.
My flashlight suddenly shuts off, I start to panic.
I click my flashlight multiple times, it finally works and I look around, but it seems to have disappeared.
I take the moment to catch my breath.
As I start for the door something catches my attention, a crate, just an ordinary brown crate.
The label reads "Use only in an emergency" I contemplate whether or not to open it, and finally decide to open it.
What I see fills me with joy, food, water,
The JourneyEverything is black, you wonder where you are.
Upon opening your eyes you see that you are in a field.
A field full of people, people suited in armor.
They are preparing for war, you slowly stand, a little dizzy.
Your head throbs painfully, raising you hand to the source of the pain, you find that you are bleeding.
A woman rushes to where you stand, she says something, but you are in to much pain to hear what she is saying.
You fall over, colliding with the ground you gasp, the pain is awful.
The woman calls over some men, they lift you up and carry you to a cot.
They gently lay you down on it, you thank them with a grunt of pain.
another woman comes, she has a tray of items on it, clothe, water, and string.
She wraps your head in the clothe, you can still see out of one eye.
She then take water and cleans a gash on your left arm, the arm that didn't have a shield.
The memories are starting to come back to you.
You were surrounded, men on all sides, each with a sword and shield, you ar
TrappedTrapped, I feel like an animal in a cage.
My life, I want out.
The torture, Pain that it brings.
The memories trapped in my head forever.
These thoughts run through my mind constantly.
I wish they would leave, I need them to leave.
I find Myself looking at photos of old friends.
Friends that are long gone now.
They have disappeared from my life, never to return.
I look back on memories of them.
They were my best friends, I thought they would stay that way forever.
Now I realize what life does, it splits me from those I love.
those I care the world about, those I would do anything for.
But they are gone now, and there is nothing I can do for them.
I walk to a room, inside it is pitch black.
The door behind me shuts, I run to it and try to turn the knob, but it's locked.
I cry out in fear, I'm all alone, no one to save me, no one to help me.
I sit at the door, hoping, praying that it would open.
Thoughts creep into my mind, thoughts of my childhood.
Happy thoughts that seem out of place
The RainThe scenery, it glistens
I look up at the trees as they drip with water.
I inhale, and smell the woods, the trees.
It makes me feel alive, the scent is extravagant.
I watch as the puddles pass by, ever so slowly.
I can see my reflection in them, and I smile.
I look around once more, the trees, so full of color.
The maple tree, with its red and golden leaves.
The white bark of a birch tree and its red/gold leaves.
The ash tree, such a spectrum of color with its red, purple, yellow, and orange leaves.
The sight of it all takes my breath away.
I look into the sky, the water peppers my face as I do.
I smile again, and think to myself, "What a sight to see."
I continue to walk through this beautiful forest.
Along a road that never seems to end.
I see a flower to my left, and you pick it.
A morning glory, the colors of purple that slowly change to a violet and the finally to white are just incredible to witness.
It is so fragile in my hands.
I realize that I might harm it, so I place it onto
My thoughtsThe blood of others corrupted souls bleeds from my cracking skin.
As it gathers in pools at my feet I see the reflections of those it came from.
These faces, they still haunt my memory to this day.
Their faces, so cold, so menacing,
So cruel as they stare me down in my dreams.
I awake to find myself screaming in the night.
The images consume my thoughts, they do not leave me.
I can picture them now, so clearly, as if they are standing in front of me.
I see one, the image appears more than any of the others.
This face resembles a woman, from what I see she is very beautiful.
Her skin so pale, almost translucent.
Her eyes are the deepest blue you could imagine.
Her hair is as black as the night sky.
The cheeks on her face are thin, as if she is starved.
Her lips, pale with the slightest tint of pink.
She hardly leaves my thoughts.
I can see her, she is trying to tell me something.
She mouths the words, "Please, save me..."
I am tormented by the thought of these words day and night.
In the Middle Of The ConfusionI find myself on the battlefield, I am in a war.
I look around, confused as to how I got here.
A comrade falls to my left, about five feet from where I stand.
I drop to my belly and start crawling for cover.
I hear several screams of soldiers young and old as they fall to the ground, dead.
"All this pain, what is the point in it?", I ask.
The sound of an explosion rings in my ears, I look back, and what I see shakes my soul.
Being thrown by the explosion are ten soldiers, men and woman that I realize are my closest friends.
I freeze out of sheer terror.
Frozen by the site of what has happened to my friends.
Tears now pouring down my face, unable to move to cover I lay there.
I know that I have to keep moving, or suffer the same horrific fate as my friends.
But I can't move, this sorrow has me trapped where I lay.
Unable to move, unable to talk.
I try again and again, but the images of my friends continues to run through my mind.
I do the only thing that is possible at a time
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Bluefley has a gallery filled with artwork that whisks you off in to a Sci-fi daydream, and keeps you captivated for hours. Marc has been a member of our community for over a decade and has achieved nothing but success with his astounding commitment to interacting with the community, sharing a prolific amount of video tutorials and generally being an all round rockstar deviant. It is no joke that we are absolutely delighted to award the Deviousness Award for April 2014 to ... Read More